If this is not ulaari, then I don’t know what is

“But my move was unconventional…”, replied my friend R who had moved to Bangalore from the Bay Area three years ago. Our email thread stalled at that point so I didn’t get a chance to learn what her definition of ‘conventional’ was. Bet it wasn’t Nagesh Kukunoor’s portrayal of Varun in Hyderabad Blues. Jokes apart, I reckon the following stories might map to most folks’ definition of conventional moves:

• S moves to Delhi/Noida from Bay Area, remains with Oracle. S’s parents live in Delhi.
• SB moves to Delhi from Boston to start and lead Sapient’s India operation. SB is originally from Bombay.
• BV moves to Bangalore from Bay Area to start and lead Yahoo’s India operation. BV is originally from Bangalore.
• RA moves to Delhi/Noida from Bay Area, quits HP and joins HCL. RA’s parents live in Delhi.

A common refrain between these stories is that the primary breadwinner secures a job first and then moves the family. In other words, there’s little downtime between the US job and the Indian job. Now let’s contrast this with that the Kurugantis are doing.

I wrapped up my responsibilities with Graspr on May 31, went on a 2-week trip to India in search of a forcing function, decided on Bangalore as our destination even before I had finalized my career move. To make life more interesting, we also decided to sell our house and, mind you, not just sell our house but also sell/give away 95% of our household belongings (more on this later). And to top it all, we were embarking on a 25-day Farewell USA road trip to bid farewell to our beloved adopted country, dear friends, and cousins. If this is not ulaari (Etymology of ulaar), then I don’t know what is.

The Last Temptation

It started innocently enough. I was telling my friend (let’s call him “Joe”) at Company X about my decision to leave Graspr and move to India. Joe immediately asked me if I was interested in exploring Company X. If yes, he was eager to introduce me to a key executive for an exciting role. It was early days of our India decision and I had left the door open for exploring US-based careers too. So I told Joe to wait a few weeks before making the introduction. I fully expected to tell Joe soon that I was in fact serious about our India plans and hence not explore the role at Company X. It didn’t quite work out that way.

Either I had miscommunicated with Joe or he got overzealous. A few weeks after our conversation, I got that introduction email to the Company X executive (let’s call him “Peter”). One thing led to another and a phone conversation was scheduled  between Peter and me. Try and picture this. There I was in the LAX airport, jamming my cell phone against my left ear and attempting to block out the airport sounds with my right hand. Considering this backdrop, we ended up having a pretty good conversation. My intrigue about Company X turned into a genuine interest in the role.

Things moved rather quickly after that. Peter wanted me to come in for a full round of interviews before my trip to India. I had one foot in India already but I had a desire to see where the Company X exploration would lead. Little did I realize that this would become my Last Temptation. I made the overnight trip to Company X just a day before a scheduled family vacation. I thoroughly enjoyed my full day of interviews. My final two meetings were with Peter and his boss. The role was indeed very exciting, it played very well to my strengths and I had the potential to hit the ball out of the park. Apparently the interviews had gone well from Company X’s perspective too. I was about to hop into my cab when Peter caught up with me and made a verbal offer. The HR manager called me on my way to the airport and discussed the offer in detail. A few days later, the offer was formalized and the ball was in my court.

In most respects, this was a great role and a highly attractive offer. Since we had already made the psychological leap to move out of the Bay Area, moving to a different American city was not a show-stopper. The only problem was that the job wasn’t taking me to India… at least not just yet. Company X did have a presence in India and Peter was very supportive of my moving to their India operation in a few years.

I had plenty of time to think about this… sorta. I was getting on a long plane ride to India and was slated to make a decision before the end of my India trip. I thought about The Two Types of Indian Immigrants and asked myself whether I really was an active should-we. The answer was “yes” but I could feel the temptation to postpone our move by a year. The spirit was willing but was the flesh weak?

Something happened in Vijayawada that tipped the scales decisively. Since my whirlwind trip wasn’t touching Vijayawada (my parents live here), my mother had planned a short visit to Bangalore to see me. Just a few days before my Bangalore stint began, my father fell sick. It wasn’t something major but he needed care and attention so my mother cancelled her trip to Bangalore. The timing of this event provided that burst of clarity and I decided… to resist the last temptation.

The road to Bangalore goes through Shasta, Portland, Cedar Falls, Chicago and New York

It’s official – we are moving to Bangalore. (How we selected Bangalore will be covered in a separate post). Before I made the 2-week scouting trip to India, Poonam had this idea for a road trip across US before our India move. It seemed like a pipe dream initially since there were so many things to finish before our move. But slowly things fell into shape. We sold our house and had to move out on July 18 but we had at least 1-2 weeks of winding down tasks ahead of us. Instead of renting an apartment for a month, why not rent a car and drive across America, we reasoned. We could always do the address changes and other sundry tasks “on the road”.

We acted quickly. Booked our air tickets for a non-stop flight from New York to New Delhi on Aug 14 and set Jul 21 as the start date of our vacation. The goals of this trip were simple. It was our Farewell USA road trip and an opportunity to meet and bid farewell to as many of our friends and cousins as possible. Our trip consultant, Poonam, mapped out three different routes from San Francisco to Chicago. The chosen route started from Pleasanton to Sacramento, went north via Redding and Shasta (in California) to Crater Lake & Portland (in Oregon) skirted Spokane (Washington) and then went due east and slightly south through Montana (Missoula), Wyoming, South Dakota, Minnesota, and Iowa before finally reaching Chicago. Return the Hertz rental at Naperville, spend 5 days in Chicago catching up with our friends and then hop onto an Amtrak train to Washington DC, spend 1 1/2 days with a cousin and two friends and do the short 4 hour drive to New Jersey by road. This would give us about 8 days in NY/NJ area which is hopefully sufficient time to spend with the plethora of cousins and friends we have in that area.

It is Jul 28 and I’m writing this post from my friend’s house in Cedar Falls, Iowa. We started from Pleasanton at 1pm on Jul 21 and reached Cedar Falls at 5pm on Jul 27 covering a total distance of 3,000 miles. The only deviation from our plan was to spend an extra day in Oregon since we started a bit late from Sacramento. Quick summary of our 7 days of driving:

• Mon, Jul 21
  • Pleasanton to Redding. Highlight was the stop in Sacramento to say goodbye to BTV (a dear friend on a miraculous recovery path after a long stint in the ICU) – he actually said “Bye”.
• Tue, Jul 22:
  • Redding to Medford, Oregon. Highlight was Crater Lake (incredible and surreal).
• Wed, Jul 23:
  • Medford to Portland/Hillsboro. Spent the evening and night with my cousin & his family in Hillsboro. Kids had a great time playing with Nishaant and his toys. We were treated to a great home-cooked meal by Amber. We were pleasantly surprised and excited to learn that Amber is a budding fiction writer in the science/fantasy fiction genre. She has already published (read “sold”) her second piece to the Cosmos magazine. Check out Going Somewhere Else – neato! Poonam and I are trying to entice Amber to move to Bangalore to feed her writing muse.
• Thu: Jul 24:
  • Hillsboro, Oregon to Missoula, Montana
• Fri, Jul 25:
  • Missoula, Montana to Gillette, Wyoming
• Sat, Jul 26:
  • Gillette, Wyoming to Sioux Falls, South Dakato via Devil’s Tower and Mt Rushmore
• Sun, Jul 27:
  • Sioux Falls, South Dakota to Cedar Falls, Iowa

I’m having trouble embedding pictures so here’s the Flickr link: Farewell USA Trip in Pictures.